So in preparation to traveling to Egypt a lot of information was thrown at me. How to live, how to speak the language, what the currency is, stuff like that. Also shown to me at least a few times was the “normal” stages of cultural immersion one goes through. It goes something like this: The Honeymoon Stage, the Hostility Stage, the Humor Stage, and the Home Stage. Briefly, they sound much like they are: in the “Honeymoon Stage” everything is wonderful and nothing seems to be upsetting; the “Hostility Stage” where everything is not so wonderful and everything seems to be upsetting; the “Humor Stage” where the minor things that were upsetting in the previous “Hostility Stage” are now easily laughed off and the larger issues managable; and finally the “Home Stage” where one succesfully feels at home in their current culture as well as their native culture. Well leave it to me to break the mold because I definitley did not follow this little pattern (thus far.)

Most likley I went through the “Honeymoon Stage” pretty quickily, I’m an idealist but not so much that the realities of the world don’t seem that far removed from everyday living. I’ll call my first few days here a “Realistic Honeymoon” =) And yeah, it was only a few days that this stage lasted in my opinion. Because in many ways this led if not straight, than almost straight to the “Home Stage”. For a good portion of the last month and a half I have felt relativley at home, having difficulties communicating sometimes but in my opinion handling them as any well-adjusted foriegner might. And then last week came. This is the part that some of you might understand and some may not; it doesn’t make you a better or worse person if you can or cannot relate, I’m just noting that this is probably going to seem different to some of you. On Monday I pretty much entered into the: “so-confused-that-it-doesn’t-really-matter-where-I-live -I’ll-be-frustrated-anyway-stage-but-living-in-Egypt-makes-it-worse” stage. And for me that really only means a couple of things could have happened. This time it was a question of faith. My attitudes and beliefs were challenged to the core and it was painful. At one of the churches I’ve been attending I had some serious questions raised in my walk of faith. Thankfully, its all stuff that at the end of the day I can fall asleep knowing where I stand with my Lord, but still the question of how I live my life daily became a crucial one: was I living with the Holy Spirit baptized into me? The pastor here, as well as most of the congregation, (there’s only about 12 of us =) seemingly believe that while I am saved and know our Lord personally, that does not mean I have been “baptized in the Holy Spirit” as evidenced by my lacking in the ability to speak in tongues. This was something that when I was first approached with upon attending one of the church’s bible studies didn’t shock me all that much to hear. You see, I had heard about this belief through my best friend Brian (although it wasn’t exactly the same). He had been having a similiar disscussion with one of his friends and we had studied and talked about it, although looking back, I definatley had only made a cursory exploration of matter. I need to apologize to Brian about that, although I didn’t even realize it at the time. And here’s why: I think I have allowed myself to become comfortable in my faith. You may read that and say, what’s wrong with that? Isn’t comfort good? Sure, to an extent, but what I mean when I say I’ve become comfortable is that I’ve become complacent. I’ve said, “Okay God, I know I am yours, I know why I am living, I know what you want me to do”. But I made a big jump in that last part, that “I know what He wants me to do” is only a half-truth. I know God wants me to serve Him with all my heart, soul, mind, and strength, and to love my neighbors as myself, but does He also want other specific things of me? This was the part I had chopped off in my thinking, that the greatest commandment and its compliment were enough, period. And here’s why I think I thought this way: it is “enough”. But our gracious God wants more for us, Jesus says: “I came that they may have life, and have it abundantly. (John 10:10b)”

So what else is there? There is the Holy Spirit and the gifts of the Holy Spirit. Now I don’t claim to have any sort of grasp on just how much or to who or what God wants to give the gifts of the Holy Spirit to other than whatever He gives is out of grace and is more than we deserve. My brothers and sisters at the church I’m going to, believe that God wants everyone to have the gift of tongues (which is difficult to pin down just exactly what the means). I am not certain to how far of an extent this is true. However I am now certain (and wish I would have always been) that God wants us to partake in the gifts of the Spirit more than I had given Him credit for. And that I need to re-evaluate how I am looking at the good things God can give. I’ve definitley been living in a “post-modern Christianity”: that the Spirit is more or less dead in phyiscal manifestation. Certainly I gave God the credit that the Holy Spirit has reign over my mind and can intercede in the words that come of out my mouth and the actions I perform, but not much more. Scripture like “the word of wisdom through the Spirit, and to another the word of knowledge according to the same Spirit; to another faith by the same Spirit, and to another gifts of healing by the one Spirit, and to another the effecting of miracles, and to another prophecy, and to another the distinguishing of spirits, to another various kinds of tongues, and to another the interpretation of tongues (1 Cor 12:8-10)” I somehow managed to make not apply to me, rather only to “other people “, the people of “Biblical Times” or people that I would never meet but maybe they exist somewhere out there in the world. But how narrow of a viewpoint is that! I think its for this very reason that Paul wrote to the Corinthians. “Now concerning spiritual gifts, brethren, I do not want you to be unaware. (1 Cor 12:1)”!

So what does this all mean? I’m not entirely sure. But I do know this. It’s time I stop being ashamed of the Word of God. I quote Paul enough to know that what was written through him needs to be measured and analyzed and not taken at first glance without any inspection, prayer, or checking of alignment against what the rest of the Bible says, but why shouldn’t I ask God for more? I’m pretty sure I haven’t taken all He has to offer, so it only naturally makes sense that I start asking for the things I know He can give me for “the common good (1 Cor 12:7)”. The caveat here is this: it cannot seem crazy or impossible that God could give me one or more of these gifts to various degrees. As soon as I shut the door and say that only the “wierd” Christians speak in tongues or only the “gifted” Christians can lay hands and heal or speak with the “word of wisdom through the Spirit” I have put God in a box, saying “Not me Lord, nuh uh.” Today I am writing because I know God has already worked many “miracles” in my life, miracles of the “spritiual kind” (redemption, freedom from sin, salvation, etc.) Today I am writing because I know God can work miracles of the “miraculous kind” in me and in you.

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Another thought that is related but not completley: has it ever occurred to anyone else reading this that the Holy Spirit does not come upon those in the Bible the moment they repent and turn towards Christ, nor when they are baptized in water? Check in the Bible, according to Drawing Near by John Bevere (which the Pastor here gave me a copy of the 11th chapter, I want to read the whole thing now to get a bigger picture) anyway, according to this: There are 5 accounts of people recieving the Holy Spirit in the NT and in all except one it was seperate from recieving Jesus Christ as Lord; as well in each of those cases bystanders could “see and hear” some phyiscal or outward manifestation of the people recieving the infiling of the Holy Spirit. While this is probably not as conclusive as Bevere seems to make it out to be, it sure does bring me pause on the matter! I believe the Holy Spirit lives within me, but when did He enter? Did anyone else notice it? I’m not sure there is a definite answer of when or a definite yes or no, but there is in the Bible (at least 80% of the time). Is this problematic? How does one reconcile this in one’s life?

Please respond! =)

[O] Jesus left such an impression on Peter and John’s lives that when other people saw them they were pointed towards Jesus.

[A] Oh cmon, this speaks for itself!  I desperatley want people not to see ME but to see HIM, reflected, indwelled, living with me.  I know I was created for a purpose and was made beautiful, but HE is so much brighter and pure that a comparison cannot even be made.  I hope that someday people cannot help but see Jesus because of me.

[P] Lord, the desire for me to point to you is pointless if you aren’t the radiant Person, God, and Redeemer I think you are.  Jesus, create in me a redefined love, deeper and more meaningful than the one I have for you now.  Lord, I know that there is a season for all things; I pray for increase.  I admit my incessant inadaquecacies, I know You are so much bigger than all this.  I pray, for increase.

[S]  “For we cannot stop speaking about what we have seen and heard.”

[O] Acts 4 is just full of conviction for me tonight.  It is natural that, when something is so great and magnificent and life-changing as Christ’s love, that one would want to share it and show it and live it.

[A] But

“i am like a mockingbird
i’ve got no new song to sing
and i am like an amplifier
i just tell you what i’ve heard
oh, i’m like a mockingbird”

except I’m probably even worse right now; I’m more like a parrot.  The connection between the words that leave my mouth and the actions and thoughts of my heart sometimes seems to barely exist.  Its clear I need to start speaking out of prompting of the Holy Spirit, not out of my intellect or self-serving ego.

[P]  Jesus, you are my Joy.  Father, you are my wisdom.  Holy Spirit, be my guide.

prayer first today; God, simply make this life of mine glorifying to You. I am here today God for no other reason; Glorify Your name, humble mine, Father.

[S] “And on the basis of faith in His name, it is the name of Jesus which has strengthened this man whom you see and know; and the faith which comes through Him has given him this perfect health in the presence of you all.”

[O] To have faith because of a name in anything is foolish, unless His name is Savior; Jesus Christ. In which case, it is foolish not to have faith, because His name itself has the power to “strengthen”.

[A] What is your call to arms? The thing/word/phrase/event/place/person that enables you to stand up and be you? For me, it has to be the name of Jesus, the person of Jesus, the death and resurrection, the awesome divinity of Christ. So, do I give that name the reverence, love, and glory it deserves? Hardly, but when I do, amazing things happen.

[P] Because of your name Lord…the cross Lord…your Love Lord…because of this I am an adopted child, grafted into the vine. God, right now I can’t ask for anything, I haven’t even truly begun to take what you’ve given me! Lord teach me stewardship and how to ask in a gloryifying way for your blessings and for what You desire.

• My God and my King has provided! Not only has a place to worship been promised to me, but a brother, broken and loving, just like me, has crossed my path. I will never been the same for it. Please pray that together we will edify one another in such a forgiegn place and that our mutual love for our Father will spread like wildfire throughout His people.

[S] “Now when they heard this [Peter’s explanation of David’s prophesy of Jesus Christ], they were pierced to the heart, and said to Peter and the rest of the apostles, “Brethren, what shall we do?”

[O]Things leading up to this point: Peter recieves the Holy Spirit and it manifests itself in him; people react to his words (i.e. the Spirit’s) and they question him; but rather than trying to explain things (he kind of does though by saying they aren’t drunk because it only the third hour), rather than trying to explain things completley from his own understanding, he quotes scripture; it’s really only after all this that he starts giving his own account/exhortation. And this too is more a commentary on what the scriptures say in relation to the present than any creative discourse. In general, Peter is so focused and in touch with the Spirit and with the Word. And as a result, what happens? THREE THOUSAND souls are added into God’s perfect and gracious care.

[A] I’m not sure if anything I have ever said has ever pierced anyone to the heart (at least not in the good way Peter did). In fact, to elaborate, I am certain that things I have said have pierced people to the heart, in a bad way. Things I’ve said to my mom, my sister, my friends and others. This has to change. I need to follow the example given here more. Let the HS do the work, and when I can’t explain, rely on scripture. Then, if I can start explaining things as I see them in relation to the Word and the world around us. If I did this more often, I’d definatley be wrong less often, and find myself not trying to argue things that really don’t matter. “…but be filled with the Spirit, speaking to one another in psalms and hymns and spiritual songs, singing and making melody with your heart to the Lord; Eph 5:18b-19″[P] to my God, giver of the Holy Spirit, lover of souls; I hurt people with my words, often. I destroy and tear town instead of building up, often. And I marginalize You and your divine Trinity, often. Thank you for the example you gave in Acts 2 of what can happen when one of your creation allows you in. Thank you for Peter’s bold reliance on the Holy Spirit and your living Word. Lord, I give my body to you as a temple, where you may dwell. Holy Spirit be indwelled in me. Live inwardly and outwardly, transforming me within so that I may be a vehicle, a vessel to transform the world. Holy Spirit quiet my ever-blaphemous tongue and speak gently and lovingly for me. Holy Spirit, intercede in all my weakness. Thank you my, our, gracious, providing, Father. Amen.

Prayer request:

• I still haven’t found a good church. Please pray that I will find a body to commune and worship with. Further, to live out the Acts 2 community with, so that I may bring more into the fold and share the Good News.

[O] Did they (the 12 apostles minus Judas) consider themselves part of Israel?

[S] “These all with one mind were continually devoting themselves to prayer, along with the women, and Mary the mother of Jesus, and with His brothers“.

[O] Hmm, with all the talk about Mary I’ve been hearing latley it’s interesting that she turns up here. I’m interested in hearing anyone else’s thoughts about the holiness of Mary? Other observation: they were continually devoting themselves to prayer. What does that look like?! (and wow, I wish I could do that.) Final observation on this verse, there’s a point made about the women praying with the 11 in the upper room (and the other 100 or so people). Does this bear any significance in the early church?

[S] This is my favorite part of chapter 1: “They were amazed and astonished, saying, ‘Why are not all these who are speaking Galileans?’ And how is it that we each hear them in our own language to which we were born? … Phrygia and Pamphylia, Egypt, and the districts of Libya and Cyrene, and visitors from Rome, both Jew and proselytes. Cretans and Arabs - we hear them in our own tongues speaking of the mighty deeds of God.”

[O] God can SO overcome language barriers. (He afterall was the one who “confused” the language in the first place.) Even moreso, God told the 11 to stay, even though they wanted to go. Then when they obeyed, the promise of God was fulfilled (the Holy Spirit came). Then, as a result, they experianced first hand the amazing fruits and gifts of the Spirit.

[A] I’m struggling so hard to speak Arabic, whether Modern Standard (fuhsa) or Colloquial (aimiya). And it’s tough to pin down any specific reason why I’m trying to learn. But I feel like God has told me to try. So until that changes I’m going to. God-willing, I will be blessed with the ability to share the Good News in Arabic some day.

[P] Abba, Father, You are my God and my King. Your perfection is complete, your knowledge unmatchable, your ability to communicate inexpressable. Father, I confess my greed and my doubt. I daily am struggling to see You and Your glory in Cairo and in not-America. I confess that I have put you in a Western box. Jesus, thank you for your blood which overcomes my simple-minded short-sighted often-times idolotry. Lord, grant me understanding to Your will, Your plan, show me how I fit into what You want, not what I want, and use what You have done in me to further Your kingdom. Temper my wants with your Desire. And I will be thankful, even when my hands are tired, my mouth dry and parched, even when the words don’t come and the evil one tells me that know one loves me, I will worship you Lord. My God, and my King.